Bandwagon, here I come!

Well, it seems that I held out quite a while but could do so no longer as I have now joined the official world of the blogger. I guess the peer pressure got to me - apparently it doesn't take much to break me!

Today was another great day in the world of first grade. It never ceases to amaze me how much I have come to love substitute teaching. My personal goal when I was in school was to do all I could to make the teacher cry like a wee little girl. Thankfully only a few have tried that on me. I hate to have to bust "Mean Ms. Jackson" out but luckily only a few kids have brought out the wrath! The best part is that most of them are hilarious and painfully cute. You can't go wrong when you get to work on "good coloring and cutting" or "good line basics" (walking in the hall like normal people). Can I say that the "Ms. Jackson" part is so strange even now, who is that?! I must be getting old though because only the 8th graders and up actually know to sing me the Sorry Mrs. Jackson song. Outkast has brought a whole new dimension to my life!

Church life at Oasis Community is going well. I am still continually adjusting to the life of a youth pastor and to the life of a small church. It is so funny how God chooses to teach us in such different ways than we would ever expect. I find myself going through times of such excitement and of feeling as though things couldn't be better and then before I know it I am wondering what in the world I am doing and why God was crazy enough to think that I could possibly handle a task such as this. Building a ministry... that is for other people who have skills... more than just the nunchuck, bowhunting, and computer hacking skills that I happen to have. (Sorry for the Napoleon reference.. I couldn't resist!) I could go on for days about all the reasons that I am not equipped for the task. Luckily I won't! (You may all breathe the sigh of relief you were waiting for!) I am glad to say that God always steps in and pulls me back in the right direction. Tonight during a bible study I went to, we talked about identity in Christ. What continually sticks out to me is the way that great people of faith take God's Word seriously (shocking concept) and really do die to self. That is, of course, the key to finding identity. I think of Peter walking on water with Jesus and the moment he began looking around at all that was going on around him, the moment he began thinking about himself and not Jesus, the moment he began thinking that the fate of the Oasis Community Youth Group rested completely on the shoulders of his ability... he began to sink. How many days do I feel completely in over my head, buffeted by the waves, drowning? To make matters worse I am promptly reminded that I am only in that place because I thought it was all about me and what I could or could not do. I know that this has been, and will continue to be, a life long battle for me. I want the control, I want to say that I did it. Thankfully I can say that at in spite of my desire to make things happen, my desire to seek God's plan is stronger. Sometimes only by a hair, but the desire is there. So, if He can get me out of the way long enough, the Oasis Community Youth Group might have a chance after all!

Funny, didn't intend to go down that road but that is what has been forefront of my mind the past few weeks. The nice thing about blogging is that I got to say it and you get to choose whether or not you care to read it!